Dr. Reeve’s vaginismus therapy
When we meet each other during the first therapy session, you’ve already taken a big step to overcome vaginismus. You have decided you will no longer put up with the suffering and you want to free yourself from it. You will probably go into our first session with hope, stress, and concerns. Hope for fearless and pain-free vaginal penetration and sex, stress about what you will experience during my therapy, and concerns about if my therapy will work for you. For me, too, it is, time and time again, an emotional event to be able to support my vaginismus patients on their journey.
We will start with a conversation about the path you’ve taken thus far and the therapies you’ve had before our encounter if any at all. We will talk about the experiences you have had and how you think and feel about your attempts at intercourse, how you react, and much more. Many patients believe they don’t have a normal, healthy body. They fear their partners will leave, they will remain childless, or simply remain different from other couples forever. Your boyfriend/spouse might also suffer from feelings of blame and fear of failure. As you can see, there is a lot to discuss. For many of our patients and their partners merely being able to talk about their problems without shame or fear and being heard and understood can be a massive weight off their shoulders.
I will explain to you exactly why you have certain sensations, where they originate from, and how you can change your response to them. We will discuss what happens in the body of someone who suffers from vaginismus and attempts to have intercourse, making vaginismus emotionally approachable. For you and your partner, it is essential to understand that vaginismus is caused by an uncontrollable reflex that nobody is to blame for, which I will explain thoroughly.
Together we will study female anatomy using images, models, and ultrasounds. Depending on the way you feel and my interpretation thereof, we will look at your anatomy at the end of the first or the beginning of the second session. If you and your partner agree, your partner can be present during this. It`s always better for the outcome of therapy if your partner is present. You won’t undergo a gynecological examination while exploring your own anatomy, and I won’t touch you unless you feel like you are able to handle that emotionally. The only reason I will touch you is to perform an ultrasound from the top of your lower abdomen ( no internal ultrasounds) and if I need to point to something ( often I work with using shadows on your skin – so avoiding any body contact).
Using mirrors and imaging procedures, you will be able to experience in real time what the vaginismus reflex does with your body. Depending on personal preferences and emotions, you will experience and notice how step by step this reflex becomes less pronounced and is transformed into a perception of receiving. At the end of the third session, I will inform you if further therapy sessions will be necessary or if training at home will suffice.